In here I drop pearls of witty greatness for your edification.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

A lot of turns of phrase

I am as mad as a wet hen. I know most of you have never seen a wet hen, but those of us who grew up eating what we grew or raised do know and it is terrible to behold. Whoever associated the word "chicken" with someone who was not brave was mistaken. Chickens are uncommonly aggressive when wet or robbed of their eggs. And armed as they are with a beak, well you get the picture.

Today I found out at work that I do indeed have life insurance. I have gone the last year since my children's father died trying to figure out how to get life insurance without paying half my paycheck for it. Every company I contacted led me to 6 more wanna-be's who sent me relentless emails, phone recordings, texts, and snail mail about their astoundingly cheap insurance. Every time I completed the forms and sent them in, I got the same rates at the same astoundingly expensive prices. Let me tell you these forms weren't a picnic or a walk in the park to fill out either. When they say you are burning the candle at both ends they really mean you are staying up nights filling out the forms to find out what you're going to do about this no insurance thing.
And burn that midnight oil I did  and never got any "cheap" or even reasonable quote.
Then today we got a packet to re-up our insurance with some new company in California. It's the big one Lizbeth... There was a beneficiary card in there with an actual explanation of benefits. Which I HAD all along these last 5 years!
No wonder, the benefits director in Kansas City who told me I had nothing has recently been indicted. I wonder where my money went?
But at last that is water under the bridge and I can say with a heavy sigh
How do you spell relief? 
L i f e  I n s u r a n c e.

Monday, June 13, 2011

This poem is for all of us who have Fallen

How can I dare
a weak and mortal man
Lift up
my feeble human hand
and seek toward the mighty hand of God?

I've earned no grace
my measure is so small
my worth
I've done nothing at all
that he should even notice
such as I.

He speaks my name
and bids me follow him
his life
he gave for every man
a love so great I can not

His love is pure
he lifts me from the fall
I reach
least worthy of them all
transformed into a treasure
by his love.